Reconnect: Choosing Internal Growth

“Reconnect” has been a critical step for me in life and well-being, so much so that it is a part of my business name: Reclaim – Reconnect – Renew.  These ideas reflect my beliefs of the steps to healing and oneness: reclaim your inner self, reconnect to your inner wisdom and intuition as well as that of the ages, renew your greatest self on all levels – body, mind, and spirit. 

My Journey

As I have shared previously, I acknowledge that I had spent much of my life outside my body. I can see that this behavior was modeled to me by my mother who was an obsessive worrier, not present and physically suffering, yet completely disconnected from self. This ended up playing out as Alzheimer’s.

In childhood, each year when I would go for my annual school physical, I would tell the doctor that I got these horrible pains behind my left eye which were then followed by nausea and vomiting. He would be completely non-responsive, going on with the examination which basically told me that I needed to simply learn to live with this issue. Thus I ignored my body’s signals and stuffed the pain. I was then taught the lesson to ignore my pain and learn to live with it. Over time, I have learned the true message is that pain is your body sending you a message – embrace it and thus heal. 

Coming within myself has been a crucial step in my path to health and happiness.  It is a daily journey and practice, some days better than others. Old habits are so familiar and making changes from that deeply established groove really takes effort and a conscious choice. As one moves unconsciously throughout the day, the old habits simply happen so easily. Staying embodied is such a simple concept, but simple is not easy.

Reconnection and Thought

“We have to be embodied if we want to love.” 

– Tara Brach

My word for 2020: Congruence truly means, to me, living within myself, fully connected as often as possible. Embodied. I was recently introduced to the works of Tara Brach and listened to her talk: Embodied Presence – Planting our Roots in the Universe.

Part 1 https://youtu.be/D_iCUuE6dn4 

Part 2 https://youtu.be/-DaCR-6o21s

This talk hit the nail on the head as to where I have come from and where I am aiming to be. At the beginning of the talk, our contemporary society is described as  “Lost in thought.” When in thought, one is not in the body but removed from the present moment, is not being present within or mindful. Mindfulness is centered on the body.  

“Thinking is not the problem. We over think, no discernment.”

– Tara Brach

Our default is to leave our bodies – disassociation leads to:

·       Fatigue

·       Judgement

·       Anxiety

·       Shame

·       Cut off from our hearts

·       Not in authentic power

·       Not in intuition or wisdom

Ultimately, we each desire to be seen and to be loved. Can, and do, we offer this to ourselves?  We each have our story of how we were not seen or felt loved in our childhood or past, but we can break that cycle and start anew.   

Looking Within

A big realization for me has been that I have lived my life being there for others. I have no regrets supporting my parents or raising my children, but have I ever fully been there for me? 

A strong message I have received this year is to be happy with what is, to stop looking out, as all answers are within. Self-love is a current theme for me. 

Thus, the challenge is to stay in the present and in body.  This is easier for me when I am in nature or doing yoga, but otherwise it is so easy to fall into numbing habits and the removal of self from body through surfing the internet, reading emails, Facebook, etc.  I have been noticing that when I walk away from my computer my hands tend to be cold and I can sense that I was not in my body. As I am working on something challenging, it is so easy to start playing an online game thinking “just one” and then hours have passed and I have left by body, created sore, dry eyes and still have my task to complete. 

This is where Tara Brach’s work Radical Compassion: Learning to Love Yourself and Your World with the Practice of RAIN comes in.

RAIN: Recognize, Allow, Investigate, Nurture

This book is a good read to learn simple steps to self-kindness and changing the groove of your patterns and life. I like the connection between yourself and your world this offers, as well. 

Tending Our Own Earth

In looking at our world, 2020 is an earth year and environmental issues loom large in society. Yet what can one do with such a large issue? We each need to tend to our own earth which is our body. Creating good soil within (our microbiome), reducing toxicity by choosing natural products, removing toxins with our choices and actions. By healing our individual worlds and coming in body we can connect to the senses, wisdom, and knowing needed to support our outer world: the planet earth. To truly connect and support ourselves requires not only living mindfully within our body, but also a connection to nature. Nature nurtures. The laws of nature apply to all.

I fully believe that as we create our best selves – body, mind and spirit – our new self will create a positive impact on the global environment as well.  A friend and colleague of mine recently stated that she entered the health world in order to help change the environmental world. She sees that as we each become embodied, healthy, aware, and well, we support the earth and its greatest needs in the process. 

We are nature. Heal yourself and you will do your part to heal the world.  

“We are earth in human form.”

– Adrián Vilasenor